I once had a ten day long night.

Have you ever been in darkness for years?

Have you ever cried out on your carpet?

Have you sipped sorrow and drowned in your tears?

I seek something no one can explain.

I get stuck in my thought streams.

I don’t know how i got here.

I almost died.

It was beautiful,

stumbling on sticks,

broken brained,

each step bringing me toward Anatolia and Bilad ash Sham,

so long forgotten.

Our Lord transforms us in ways that we would resist.

Don’t be a Yunus.

You are already in beautiful sunlight.

Nineveh is not what you have imagined.

Things can yet change.

It begins in your heart and carries you toward your destiny.

You ride a green leaf on a long twisting vine with deep roots.

You look down.

It comes out of your chest.

How strange.

Things speed up.

Where is my tasbih?

I need to remember.